The thought-provoking periodical for thinking idiots
Things You Won't Eat
Some cultures consider cheese disgusting. Here are a few things you might not choose from the menu.
Would you eat a wasp? How about a wasp in a rice cracker? How about lots of wasps in a rice cracker. Does that idea give you a buzz? Rice is low fat and full of protein. Wasps are full of protein – (81%!) and they're low in fat too. Really. We're not winging it. So, how did these crackers earn their stripes?
They're made in Omachi in Japan, a small city about 120 miles North East of Tokyo. Wild wasps (well, you'd be annoyed if you were going to be made into a cracker, too) are caught, boiled, dried and then mixed into the cracker dough. They cost about 370 yen (about £1.60) for a bag of 20. Crackers not wasps.
Sort of like a chocolate chip or raisin cookie but better for you.
To wash it down, how about a mug of hot 'elephant' coffee?
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Black Ivory Coffee – the world’s rarest and most expensive coffee! 100% Thai Arabica beans are picked from altitudes as high as 1500 metres. The beans are then mixed into a mash with fruit and fed to the Elephants. Once the beans are deposited, they are handpicked, rinsed, sun dried and roasted.
The taste is said to be dark chocolate with a hint of grass, spice and cinnamon. It is a softer flavour with a less burnt or bitter taste than other coffees. The aftertaste is clean and sweet.
The elephant is still buzzing.
Mice Wine
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Heard of rice wine, how about mice wine?
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In Korea mice wine is a traditional health tonic (not so much for the mice). Mice are added to and left to ferment in rice wine.
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The resultant infusion is said to taste like petrol. At least a dozen mice, no more than 3 days old (to avoid the unpleasant possibility of shed hairs, are added in the bottle. They are generously allowed to drown, and kept there for 12-14 months to ferment then left in the bottle, presumably to give an attractive appearance (or possibly to warn people to avoid it!).
Deep Fried Tarantulas
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A popular snack in Cambodia is the Zebra Tarantula. Local people believe eating them enhances their beauty. They are commonly tossed in sugar, salt and crushed garlic with oil. They are deep fried until the legs are stiff, as this ensures the abdomen contents are not too runny. The resulting crispy snack, also known as a-ping, is believed to taste like crab.
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Some might say this dish is still more appealing than having a live one creeping about.
How to Eat Slugs
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Leopard Slugs and Dusky Arions are the go to species. Apparently, Banana Slugs (the old favourite) are now sadly on the decline. Some say black Arions taste of rubber, and just licking them (raw) can numb your tongue.
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A favoured recipe is deep fried slugs with green tomatoes (funny how many disgusting foods involve deep frying!). The slugs should be kept alive in a bucket, or some such, and provided with plenty of healthy greens for a few days to detoxify them. Then kill and clean them (two birds, one stone) by soaking them in water/vinegar. Rinse, simmer in water for a few minutes, change the water & repeat until there is no more slime.
Next is some slug surgery: slit the ventral (belly) side of each slug, taking care not to damage the organs, and pull out the digestive gland (toward the rear), and any other loose bits and pieces that are easily removed. Flip the slug inside-out, and slice into the inside of the mantle and remove the shell (yes, the shell: there may well be one - remember that slugs evolved from snails).
Rinse the slugs once more, and coat with seasoned breadcrumbs if preferred. Deep-fry until golden and tuck in! Apparently tasting something like a cross between calamari (texture) and chicken (flavour).
A word of warning: garden slugs (of any sort) are known to be full of parasites & toxins in their digestive tract and slime contains high levels of these. Some of the parasites & bacteria may be linked with meningitis. Did you really want to eat one anyway?